Waiting for the Rain to End
by pyrofreeze
Summary: “Have you ever wanted something so bad that you chased after it, no matter how hopeless it seemed? Chased it, even though you knew that it would most certainly be your end?”


**_Waiting for the Rain to End_**

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I once heard of a man who wanted something so badly that he dedicated his life to finding it; but in the end, it was his obsession that was the end of him. The fixation wound around his throat slowly like a boa constrictor, and slowly (_oh so slowly_) took his life away moment by moment, until there was nothing left but cold flesh, and dead eyes, staring unblinking into oblivion. 

I don't know where I heard the story, and I don't remember the details; perhaps it was in a book, or merely a story told by a street performer in Agrabah or perhaps in Neverland—Or maybe I've mixed up every story I've ever read (_or think I've read_), and this is the result. Or perhaps the story is something my mind made up in order to tell me something. I don't know, and I think perhaps a part of me _doesn't want to know_, but I think the point is, that _I once heard a story about a man_, and how that man let his own desires kill him. And now I think that it's happening to me.

"_But that shouldn't be so._"

I don't know how many times I've whispered that in the night waiting for the rain to stop—_not that the rain ever stops_—and I wonder how I've let a desire ensnare my senses so wholly that their would be no turning back, even when I began to realize why I feel as though I were slowly choking. And it's times like that that I wonder if the raindrops running down my cheeks are really raindrops at all. (_But I've never cried_ _before, so why start now?_)

And as I lie waiting for the rain to stop, I remember what brought me to the place I was, lying alone in the streets in a _World that Never Was_ (_And never should have been_), hiding from those that I could have—_but never did_—call kin. And I remember green eyes, and red hair, and _fire_ setting all my senses aflame; and most of all I remember desires, and how that desire (_or perhaps a whim?_) spurred a man (_who was more made of fire then water_) to want to protect me…

…And then inevitably I always remember corpses, and their oh so familiar faces; the dead, lifeless flesh (_so much like the man in the story_), destroyed not by their own desires—"_They followed _Xemna's_ ideology, and _Xemnas's _desires after all" I remind myself_—but by mine.

_And I feel the weight of their lifeless eyes on me even now. Sightless forever, and forever a burden on my (_nonexistent_) soul._

And then another fleeting desire drove me from those eyes, and that blood red hair. And now if the Organization doesn't kill me, (_if _he _doesn't kill me_) the other side will, and in the end I'll get what I wanted (_my thirst for knowledge quenched_), but it'll have ended me (_not killed; never killed. To be killed would be kinder_.).

And I've been lying here, with the rain dripping on my face—_drip drop, drip drop_—waiting for the rain to stop, and remembering the story of a man. And as I hear footsteps approach, and see a boy with silver hair and a blindfold, I can't help but smile—_because this was what I was looking for, right?_ —And think to myself—_while trying desperately not to think about red hair and green eyes, and trying not to regret choosing _this _road_—that "_this perhaps is my epilogue_."

And in the end I get my answers, only to have them pulled away along with all my memories, one by one, and I think "_This is a fate crueler then death, but I think it's a fitting end._" And I find myself thinking that the only way my death could have been more fitting, was if it had been by burning.

And before I forget, I find myself whispering to the boy in the blindfold, "_Have you ever wanted something so bad that you chased after it, no matter how hopeless it seemed? Chased it, even though you knew that it would most certainly be your end?_", and I remember that he smiled (_as if he understood_), and then…

…_Oblivion_…

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A/N: I was looking through some of my older documents and stumbled across a rough copy of _this_, and I decided to post it. This fashion of writing is a bit… different from my usual style, and I honestly forget what inspired me to write this, but… I hope you guys like it anyway. :D 

_Reviews are loved and appreciated. ;)_


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